Thorns don't have to hurt?

As I go about my days, they are good but there is some tough ones thrown in. I look at the bricks that surround me and realize I think I went down some. Wait a minute the light looks further away. Why? I thought I was doing good. Why can't it be easy like in the beginning? Since I have traveled this road before I understand whats happening. See you do great in the beginning giving you a false sense of hope that it will stay that way. However as you travel up on those thorns you will get knocked down some. While the happiness you are feeling is slipping away, those old feelings of unworthiness, not good enough, well you get the picture. Anyways as those feeling start to come back now the real fun begins. It took me awhile to learn that even though I "loved" the instant gratification and the rush it wasnt lasting. The more I partook of the acts that lead to the rush the more I needed. I had to learn to love myself. I had to learn to like myself. I had to learn to encourage myself. I had to learn to be ok with who I am, but I had to learn who I was first. It was time to put the old away.  Now it's time to dig deep. it's time to get to the real issues and turn it around. Now lets get to why we feel the way we do. Why we do the things we do. We already know why we cut, snort, smoke, hit, sexual acts to get that adrenaline rush. That high that doesnt let you feel anything. So now I must learn why I do the things I do. It doesnt matter that I love the rush. It doesnt matter that I crave that rush. It's a moment of instant gratification that once This time I am not sure what happened to land me in the well back where I had second skin as a comfort but I also knew it was time to head back towards the light. This time its a bit harder than the first. This time though I have to fight a little harder, I have to work a little harder to get back to the light. So the thorns dont have to always hurt but you don't want them to stick around. You do not want to get comfortable with thorns. Their main purpose is to pierce the skin, so now lets use them to get higher up the well...