Rawness

I will try my best not but I make no promises.....its not that I want ordinary day to day life but this is all just too much. I am strong but I am weak. I am a fighter but yet can not fight, I am tired but yet can not stop. I am getting up but yet don't know how much longer. I am sure there's a test in this for me and yet I feel like I have failed. I have tried to hang on and yet it may be the tinest knot and yet I'm still hanging on somehow...... I am not done but yet I feel like I am done. My life is mine but yet it is not.