So right now I have the mask that everything is great when in truth if I could just go to sleep and wake up in Heaven where I have no more pain, where my body is perfect and not damaged, where I can actually run and not fall, where I can sit and eat a meal without worrying bout being nauseated or gonna puke it up, where love surrounds at all times, where I can actually rest because I have done this world by myself for so long, where I can crawl up in Jesus lap and nobody make fun of me or forget me. Now that I took my mask of for a minute, it's time to put my happy mask back on.
I suffer in silence because all around me everybody is busy living life, struggling through their own issues, while mine has been the same for a few years now. I am so tired of this merry go around, I have no clue how to get off so I just hold on tight. At times it goes in circles fast and then faster and then other times it slows down to a crawl. I keep hearing just hold on you are almost there. My grip is so tight on the pole, my fingers will have to be pried off. I keep hanging on because it's all I know to do. The merry go around picks up speed, my arms are tired, my body aches, my soul hurts, I try to keep a smile on my face but even that at times is to much energy. I look both ways but all around me is a blur. How do I get off this merry go around without losing my sanity
