It has been 19 days into the new year, just a little late, but better late than never. My year has seen many challenges, some great and some bad, and some of my darkest days (will talk about that in another post). Last year my year starts out with chemo, radiation and check ups with some therapy thrown in for good measure. My year ended with appointments, doctor visits, testing and more therapy mixed in. Now in between the beginning of the year till the end of the year I went back to work and we had construction going on and a few projects thrown in for good measure. I was pushing to get back to normal, my first day back at work and for a few weeks afterwards I knew something was different. It took me about a month to accept that while the world went I had changed, it wasn't intentional it just happened. Once I finally accepted that my life would be forever changed, I had to learn to live again.
For a few months I did try to learn to live but I couldn't quite get there. Then in September I got the news that I had a rare disease and my life had started on this roller coaster of extreme highs and extreme lows. That's when the appointments, testing and visits started and they didn't end till the last week of December. So in the middle of my year I should have been resting but I had no clue as to what I was about to face or even deal with. In saying that statement I also realized that I wouldn't of changed that time for anything.
Last year was a year of learning my strengths, my weakness, who really cares and who is just passing through being polite. I learned that I could push myself past my limits and still survive. I learned that even though I had some of my darkest days, I will make it, I'm coming out of them now. I learned that it was okay to let some things go and to hold on tight to other things. I have learned to rely on God just a bit more than I did before. I have learned that when I am having a bad day that it's okay to call, text a friend and ask for help/prayer, although I'm still learning that one today. Last year was the year I had to fight, I had to grow, I had to rest, I had to step back a step or three.
This year will find me moving forward and in saying that I will do more blog posts and will tell you my story in the hopes that it will at least help one. This year will find me with a new "normal" and moving forward into what God has for me. I will try to make my posts not so long but I don't promise anything because I love to write.
Later jelly bean.......
